PH_IX ... FRINGE material?

A strange dream indeed ... it was like I was watching an episode of FRINGE! So, I've written in that form, which changes the actual dream very little, just organizes it better. PH_IX TEASER: We start in what seems to be a lab. It has a few scientists in white coats and tables and equipment, but sparsely appointed. The strange thing is that the rooms seem to be made out of stone blocks. "How's he looking, Brains?" "Not so hot, Phil. I think we have to crunch the data and work on other variables." "I just can't see what we're doing wrong! I KNEW we should have waited for more information." "You know the rules, desperate times call for desperate measures. We are to use what we have and fill in the blanks ourselves." "Even if eventually we are the ONE scrambled inside like these guys?" "They are military prisoners, we can do anything we want to them. It's your turn to free up the workspace, Brains." "Oh, OK." Brains walks through a short narrow stone hallway, ducks under a low ceiling as a series of doors open for him and each close behind him as he gets past them, then straightens up when he gets to the next room. It is made of polished red granite walls of large blocks, the whole room is nearly cube shaped. In the middle of the floor is a red granite rectangular box. He reaches in and we move over to a top view so we can see that he is trying to get a body out of the box. He is having trouble getting in a position to move the body. That's when the supposedly dead body opens it's eyes. They snap to the man's face, who is in shock. "Braaaaaaaaains!" We see a POV of us rushing towards the scientist's face, we see blood, we pull back to see the scientist thrashing about as he is pulled into the box. More blood is spattered. Quiet. Then we see two corpses pulling themselves out of the granite box, shuffling towards the exit of the room. cue titles we hear a tone that sounds like the Violet Sedan Chair's "Hovercraft Mother" Walter: "Ah, it's ready!" Olivia walks in as Walter is humming "Hovercraft Mother" and walking toward a machine in his lab. Olivia: "Is that a new machine?" Astrid: "Walter is trying to ressurect food." Walter: "Re-substantiate, actually Aphid. Olivia, how nice to see you again! Come, come! You can look inside with me!" Olivia gives a look to Astrid, but Astrid gives a look that she is sure it is safe, so Olivia relaxes and goes on over with Walter. Walter opens the door as Olivia stands to the side and kind of peeks around to take a quick look. Olivia: "So, what is that, Walter?" Walter, looking crestfallen says: "It was supposed to be lunch! It is a dehydrated pizza I am trying to rehydrate in a few seconds like in Back to the Future II, but --" and then the pizza explodes and covers Walter's face. Astrid and Olivia cry out asking if Walter is alright. Olivia reaches up with a towel that she finds nearby, but Walter holds up his hand and licks the pizza from around his mouth. Walter: "Needs more basil and mushrooms perhaps?" Astrid: "Walter, you need to be more careful! What if that was hot cheese exploding onto your face!" Walter: "Don't be silly, the cheese tastes perfectly fine. It's the sauce I was talking about." Astrid just states at him in disbelief, then shakes her head and goes on with what she was working on. Olivia: "Well, you will have to put this on the backburner, Walter. We have a new case." Walter: "Oh good, where are we going this time?" Olivia: "Broyles' office." Walter: "That doesn't sound very Fringey ... unless -- is it raining in his office?" Olivia: "No, it's military and sensitive, so they just want to pick our brains for now." Walter: "The military ... they always want to pick my brain! Olivia, before we go, could you be a dear and pick a bit of sausage out of my nose? No, wait, I think I can get it." He picks something from his nose and puts it in his mouth. "Oh dear, I don't think that is from the pizza." But he goes ahead and chews it up anyway with a "huh, not too bad" tilt of his head/look on his face. Interior, Broyles' office: Broyles: "As you know, the military is just starting to open it's doors more to us, but it is a slow process indeed. Something happened at one of their military bases but they won't tell us many details yet. They won't even call it a Fringe Event, but if it were not part of The Pattern they would not bother to contact us at all. All they will tell me for now is that they have lost contact with it." Walter: "It's the aliens at Area 51, isn't it? They escaped and are now flying around in an Aurora plane, trying to find one of their bases?" Broyles: "No aliens, Walter." Walter: "Of course not. It's never going to be aliens, is it?" Olivia: "Which base is it then, Sir?" Broyles: "I was able to ascertain that it is on or near a place familiar to you, Olivia. One you grew up on, in fact. The one with your dad and the door he painted red."< Walter: "Oh, let's go there now, Olivia! Maybe we can convince the people there to talk to us if we bring them a pizza! I don't want any sausage on it, though. Not after my debacle." It turns out it is an underground facility near the base. What they have done is re-built the Great Pyramid Complex of Egypt, realizing it was not monuments or tombs, but a complex for a machine. The Sphinx, the three pyramids, and the temples and smaller pyramids around it all worked together in this complex. The Great Pyramid itself was a machine to help them to resurrect/heal people who were near death it seems. But the later culture only got part of it and used mummification instead for death only. The mistake on the base resurrected people only partially, thus creating zombies. The clues to resurrection is the title of Program "PH_IX" and one of the scientist at the start said "the ONE scrambled inside". You jumble the word ONE to go INSIDE the blank _ in the middle of PH and IX (not meant to be the Roman numeral 9 after all). So, you end up with PHOENIX. (PHIX = FIX? also why the other name PHIL?) The military wanted to use it to get injured soldiers back into the field faster. One additional idea is that at the end of the episode, when they think it's all taken care of, we realize it was actually a trap to lure Olivia there. And she is faced with the mysterious man with the X on his shirt who she said is going to kill her! This episode then would include many references to Season 3, Episode 19: Lysergic Acid Diethylamide. This would provide the stinger for the end of the episode!

The Loneliest People

I find myself on a campus. I see a campus tour in progress, so I get in the group and become part of it on the sly. I hear scraps of information on older classes and former students, and I try to hear names I'd be familiar with, but there are none. Where are they? I am in my dorm room. I come back to my computer. It is a mess of boxes and cords, it looks like I moved some of this around some earlier. I open all my chat programs. I don't see anyone on. Then some come on some, and I wait for them to contact me, because then they will want to talk to me. Nobody does. I go to contact them and after I send the message, they go on "Away" or "Do Not Disturb" or seem to sign off. Not a single one stays on to talk to me. This makes me sad in a complicated way. I should be OK with people not wanting to talk to me. I am good on my own. I have done no harm, have I? Maybe I'm just not good at being friends. Maybe my dad was right about me, and I have Asperger's Syndrome or something that does this to me. To other people -- denying them my friendship? I fiddle with the boxes and tangled cords. I find an extra mouse on the floor and realize it is not the mouse I am using, but I still go about trying to untangle the cords. Thus occupied, I miss a call on my cell phone. I had totally forgotten I even had a phone until now! I go over to it but as soon as I touch it it stops ringing. I look up the call log and dial the last number who called me. It's a woman on the other line. we say hi, then I ask pardon who is this? She says she just called me not too long ago, but we hardly talk so she kind of understands. She says wait and plays me a song over the phone. It has lyrics. It was about promise hopes dreams connection wanted but denied. Meanwhile I had time to think of who this is. When the song is over I ask if she was the one who gave me a shortened form of her name ... is this Steph? (meanwhile during this call somehow I have moved from inside to being under a tree) She replies, "did you listen to the song, or were you just trying to recall my name?" "Both," I answered. She acted as if I was being selfish ... how is that selfish I was listening to YOUR song and thinking of YOUR name. She ignored me and played another song. I said "I'd like it if we talked, please." "Shh, maybe after this song." A couple guys came up to me asking people if they wanted to try a dish. The last ones denied it and walked hurriedly one. They next came to me. They said it was a French breakfast, called "cobb". It looked like a kind of pulled meat and bread and a sauce or something. I said I would like to try it. Then they told me they had run out of clean forks. I said I had one in my dorm room. It is right near the front so it won't take me long to go get it and come back. I have trouble leaving though. I make sure i have everything, but a few steps away I don't know where my cell phone is. I search my hands .. nope! I search my pockets as I walk back to where I was. Lots of things in my pockets. An MP3 player, a e-book reader, a portable movie player ... keys maybe, a wallet, all kinds of stuff, but no phone -- wait there it is. I listen and see I have not lost the line with "Steph" The song is still playing. I go inside and go to the right and go through a door. Wait, this isn't right. There are all females in here. I start to walk forward thinking this has to be a mistake. No one stops me. Suddenly I see a scene a few feet down the hallway. This woman storms off away from this other woman, saying she gives the worst advice! I feel awkward so I just want to get out of there. I turn around to go back the way I came. The woman who "gave bad advice" says "you give good advice, maybe you could go talk to her, or tell me if I did wrong." but I pretend she wasn't talking to me. She didn't say my name, and I just wanted OUT OF THERE. So I come to the narrow entry way and a woman is leaning diagonal in it blocking it, talking on the phone I think. I duck under her just as she is moving to just be on the side I am ducking under. I brush her and say I'm sorry and move on my way. She didn't seem to mind. She says hi after me, but I am already out. Now I am walking through what must be the male's side. I go into a large open room, there a man is giving new people a tour. I turn on the light in here and move on. I go through the double doors and into a narrow hallway. It is very narrow and very dark. I cannot find the switch here. I keep moving forward nevertheless in this dark narrow hallway with walls pushing my shoulders in compressing me. Then I see another set of double doors at the far end. I hear voices, I see light. I come through the doors, I push through, and finally stumble out into another cavernous room. Everybody seems new and strange, everything in here seems unfamiliar and I am kind of curious but I just want to get to my dorm room already. This place has partitions separating a big space into smaller areas. One place is a place to show movies on a screen. I walk down the aisle and back up again, big women in wheel chairs move out of my way. Then I get to t he top again and i have to go down this ramp to get out, but it is blocked by big women sitting on it. We talk and they move just enough for me to squeeze past. Next I get to another hallway made form partitions and I think my dorm room may be just after this, but again I have big women in my way, some in wheel chairs, so I have to manouvre past them. I get to my room again. This is odd. It is my room, but not at the same time. Therefore I get feelings of relief for getting "home" again; but at the same time both the journey back and parts of the room itself seem foreign. I start as I remember I am supposed to be looking for a fork and I find it, but then I start again as I remember I am also supposed to be listening to the cell phone. It's gone missing again. I look around all over the place. I end up finding a weird object I have never seen before. It is a small black cube. It open in half in two thick halves. I realize it is a phone, but certainly it is not mine, where did I get it? I start to close it as it rings, but it is too far to closing up so I lost the call. It says "DROIIIIID" just like my phone and buzzes in my hand just like my phone. Huh ... so I open it and it has a message saying i missed a call hit the up button to hear it. so I did. It's "Steph", and she is apologizing for not really talking to me. When I hit the "call back" button I wake up and lose the dream. NOTES: I just heard a song on a random iTunes Ambient radio station "air-lounge" by Kings of Convenience called "Misread" that sounded a lot like the second song she played on the phone. Here is the music video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOxE7IRizjI Here are the lyrics: http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858513064/ I love the line: "How come no-one told me, All throughout history, The loneliest people, were the ones who always spoke the truth." That is very true, in my life anyway. I also feel the same way as this other comment: "You know, they say the meaning of the song is the meaning to you. To me its not about a girlfriend neccessarily, it's about relationships with people in general. The person this song is about is a very honest and up front person. He has a habit of picking out peoples flaws and letting them know about it with honest intentions, but the other person gets hurt and misunderstands his intentions of trying to be the best friend you'll ever meet. A friend that will be brutally honest simply becuase of the fact that he wants to make you an even better person. Long story short, he burns a bridge because the other person doesn't get it." So, it is curious that a song that sounded a lot like a song I heard in my dream turns out to have meaning in the dream I had! I do not lose people because I don't try to be friends, I do not lose people because I am not listening. I lose them because I listen all too well and I'm honest and look for the bigger picture, looking for what is important, and I lose them to truth, to honesty, to trying to be the best friend I can be. So, by now, I reach out but also hold back. Which makes me OK being alone I like it, but at the same time lonely and sad because I am not able to be friends to people and help them help themselves to really shine! With us all shining healed and looking at the bigger picture and not letting society and GROUPS tell us how we are supposed to act or care for then we could be living in a place of true Freedom! But the vast majority of people would rather remain chained to deceptions. What else is there to do here anyway? It is built to do that. *sigh*

Infiltrating the Restaurant, Meeting Her, Then Trying to Survive Him

A group has tasked me with infiltrating a restaurant. Not as a waiter, but with a different group. I am handed a handful of pamphlets of two sizes. One folds in thirds or quarters and is about the size of the a letter. The other folds in half and is about the size of a postcard. I go into a restaurant that serves seafood. It is early evening and it is quite a bustling place, with early drink specials and stuff. I find my way to the person I have been told to try to convince to get me into their group. She is a dark woman. Dark brown skin, dark brown eyes, dark brown hair. She looks through the papers. As she unfolds a bigger one, I see it has a partially filled-in crossword puzzle in it. She points out what has not been filled in yet ... three words that all start with the letter "F". She flips through some others, none of them are filled-out much. She keeps them, but tells me I could do better, a lot better, and offers a job as a waiter instead. I said I didn't think I'd be very good at it. I have forgotten the rest but bits and pieces ... Our conversation was overheard and this one girl came up to me and said she was sorry things didn't work out. We hit it off right away. I am in the car with this other girl (opposite coloring of the other, also younger) and people like my brother mom and dad. We are being driven around. My dad stops us at a site he wants us to see, but we are dead set against it. The young woman and I want to get back home in time to watch the new FRINGE. Besides we'd visited it before and didn't particularly want to go. It was this weird thing that was haunted ... or not. It was a small thin shack set on top of a well like hole. Underneath it was a cave/carved out system of rooms with a house inside and other things. He was voted down and we were going to leave, and I was starting to talk to this young woman when I woke up. Well, more like my eyes stayed closed but the dream went away and it was all dark.

Boss-caught (dream becomes a real philosophical nightmare)

I was talking to a friend. I had finally calmed her down and gotten her to talk things out with me, so that she could focus on her own path again when ...

My boss at work comes into the room. Everything around her changes. She says she's been hearing some things and wants to know if I want to come in and talk to her.
No ... I don't.

and I woke up venting:
No I don't want to talk to you
the last 2 times did not go very well
when I needed you, you failed me
why would I want to make it a third time?
It's all about what you want to say, how you see things
I might as well have not been there, I was superfluous.
Now ...
You have your spies whispering negative gossip and innuendos in your ear
Because apparently that is the best way to get attention from you
and you trust them over reality
you trust gossip from your spy network over what is real
as you keep people here, placating them, who are bad
but those that are good you ignore or don't respect or appreciate
But
You won't listen to that
why should you?
you are on your power trip
you can see things however you like
i am just a peon
i am just a slave
no matter how high I jump when you say jump
you will still turn on me whenever you feel like it
just cause
my last boss pretended to care about me, too
gave me mixed blessings
said how reliable I am and a good worker
but over-reacted when she thought i was doing wrong
that piece of paper you have keep from her
where I was written up
I was put between two hard cases
I had to move with the current throwing me under
so I could survive it still breathing
bruised but alive
she threaten me with insubordination
"go home and think about it"
rather than listen to my side of things.
I was wrong period
It was not fair.

And you are not fair, either.
Therefore there is no point in talking to you
you have already cemented your opinion of me
you already give me piss-poor reviews that do not match all I do here
as if I am like everybody else ... I am not, nobody is
as if your little spies know me any better
they don't, they don't have the eyes in their hearts to see me properly

I deserve raises
I will never get one
I deserve respect
but that apparently will take it away from others
You are the kind of manager/boss
that in order to be seen as doing your job
you have to find ways to save the company money
I suppose
but why do you not give trouble to the workers who are actual bad workers
and instead give trouble to those of us just trying to do our jobs ...
with a smile, with a heart, with out getting a heart attack.

You've already made up your mind.
The security goons are already on their way
to escort me to the gates of oblivion
this apocalyptic landscape that is the US economy
go ahead, throw me to the debt hounds
for no real reason at all
but the ones you've made up based on lack of context spy rumours.

***

I was talking about something at work yesterday in the cafeteria
and my boss walked by
I don't know what she heard
or what exactly I was saying
I don't trust her
she relies on her 'little spies" instead of the truth
I can't really just be
I'm never going to get a raise!
I'm never going to be heard by her!
I have no idea what to say, how to say it, how to be myself while hiding at the same time
wearing a mask of lies for her to be calmed from seeing
I DO my job, and I am like the heart here.
I lift spirits.
But my work doesn't go appreciated
even if it did, I would then have to be at a constant work level that would be impossible to continue
GAWD this world sux!
I hate it here
there is nothing i can do about it
I am tired of it!
I am tired of the bullshit
I am tired of the deceptions
I am tired of the deceptions and bullshit WINNING

Vacation! (aka Was her smile going to save me?)

I am in an apartment, but it feels oppressive and dark. I have to get out of here!
SO STRESSED OUT!!!!

I find somewhere to go! I was invited? It's a road trip. I am on the road, driving for hours.

I am in a building complex. It has spacious rooms. It has several buildings. It seems more small town or near the woods than urban which is nice.

They are starting a festival. They want me to start it off with the traditional announcement! I know so little about it, why me? But they insist. I am nervous, I wonder if it is a trick, are they teasing me, setting me up to fail? It doesn't matter, I am going to do it, and if I am going to fail I am going to win doing it! I make a rousing impromptu speech. I catch the eye of this one woman.

I am travelling from one building to another on a path. I see a housing building. The woman who liked my speech the most is entering the building. I watch her progress, curious as to who she is. But then she stops short turns on a dime and is coming back out towards me. She catches me looking at her. Embarrassed, I look away. I continue to my destination, reaching it and entering the building.

Vague memory ... too dearth of details to help.

Now I am in my car, trying to get my stuff together to leave. I steal forlorn glances at that woman's residence. I see her walking with her friends, laughing. I hide in my work at getting prepared to leave. There seems to be so much to leaving, so much complication and stress! I don't want to go. I leave my stuff and start walking up to the woman to talk to her. Her friends see me and leave her. She is turning to face me and ...

-end of dream due to waking up-

Alert: adding dream posts from other journals here.

Hi, I am going to try to consolidate my dreams to this journal.
I am going to be sure they are dated when I had them.
For example, I am starting with my other blog here on blogger before i decided to separate my dream journal from my vents/life journal. So, the latest those dreams are is August 2009. SO entries I add from there (and delete from there) are from August 2008 back to December 30, 2008.
And I have yet to find my other bloggers or try to add in hand-written ones!

But I just wanted you guys to know, because I am not sure how they will show up if you follow or RSS me or however this works.

I am putting them here as-is. I guess the hard part is if I find any with comments. In that case I'll keep a copy where i found it with the comments, and add them inside the Dreampost at the end as a PS if they are mine or I find the comments especially enlightening to the dream :)

That is all, carry on! :o)

The Waiting (Rooms) Game

I am in a complex amalgam of a place. It has many areas to it. It has a house, a dorm room, a building too!

The building has a central cavernous room with lots of light switches and stairs. Seems awfully plain to me, white. Lots of stairs, going in different directions, to different doors, behind which I would be in a conference room, or an office, or a dorm room, or a house, or out in the woods somewhere. We are guided when in this building, a group of us, and ushered to go through a certain door. The group peeled off to go to different doors.
One time I am with a group and we need to recall what directions to follow. It was dark, not pitch black mind you, but more light would certainly help. So, voluntarily, I flicked on several light switches to help light our way. Even though not all the light switches worked, I felt some relief from my group. Still, a lot of them took pains to pretend not to notice or that it was not my doing or whatever. But 2 or 3 noticed and thanked me. I felt a little hurt from the people who acted as if this was nothing or even "wrong" while at the same time I felt embarrassed with the people who noticed and praised me.
A member of my family went so far as to run over to the light switch I just turned on and turned it off with much gusto and fanfare, but all that did was put ONLY members of my family in the dark (it was a weird effect, like an shadow spot light, a spot shadow?) and they slowed down as they couldn't see where they were going. I had to keep going with my group so I didn't have time to fix that.

(NOTE: I can't remember a lot now. Why do dreams fade from memory like this? Are they only in your short term memory or in a different memory bank altogether, made only for dreams, and it just so happens you can/it leaks to your short term?)

I open a door and I am in a house. Soon the members of my group that came with me change. They become other people, sometimes they look the same but their aspects of their lives are different. Some change more drastically. They all take on roles like actors. How interesting! Except now I am falling into my role as well. I mean to resist and stay ME so I can observe the others doing this, but I just gradually become my role instead.
I have to wait here. But I am not sure what I am waiting for will come to pass. I should, then, move on to something else, but I can't. I have to wait this out for as long as possible, even if it seems more like it is in vain and nothing will happen next. I can go to room to room, waiting room to waiting room I suppose, as I play the waiting game.
NOTE: Obviously this role I am playing is far more patient than waking me :o) I mean, I CAN be patient, but if waiting upsets me I get frustrated and angry and upset and impatient. If I feel I can't make progress because of my limitations (I don't have the best hand-eye coordination it seems, so if I have a task to try to fix something with small parts or it's not cooperating and just getting worse, it upsets me).
NOTE: I am missing details here as well like ... I got here by car, not by walking through a door, is one change to this role. I recalled some of the car ride here. I was not the driver, a friend saw me at the bus stop and picked me up. I am sure I dreamed that particular event because I talked to an online friend and that happened to her. I had "prayed" for that for her (and at the same time saw it in my minds eye), and moments later she tells me it happened! I hadn't even told her yet I was "praying" for that!

I end up in a room and I am looking through some of my stuff. One of my items is a scrap book and a Ziploc baggie full of stuff. I put the book on the table and dump out the contents of the bag. I am bored, so I decide to arrange the stuff from the bag on the table. I forget what they start out to be, but my memory is when they are mainly pictures of different women. Full body shots, smiling at the viewer. Most are close up of their smiling face. I arrange them in a matrix on the table like a game of Memory. I don't really look at them, I am just arranging them to pass the time.
Then I notice that some of the pictures have changed. One woman in the pictures starts to repeat. The pictures of her seem bigger. She is naked now. Then I look closer because I thought I saw a movement and it is sexual in nature now.
I am embarrassed, what if people see me? I am embarrassed to be embarrassed for being interested. It's her choice, I am just admiring the beauty of Creation.
Still ...
I hear that I can go now, so I quickly get all my stuff together in a bag to leave ... except I leave the scrap book and the pics on the table.
I am about to follow a nice woman when a man runs right in front of me, almost knocking me over! He runs into a wall, running too fast to stop, but he uses his arms to break his run into the wall and flips around and puts his back against the wall. Another man is coming towards him saying "No where to run, no where to hide, no more shadow fleeing from the sun, no more water trying to escape up the beach with the tide, for you no more bad fun, it's time to pay for those that cried". It sounded like a song.
The man being chased reached out for me, and for a moment I was looking through his eyes, and as I was I saw an escape route, the man chasing me had not come around the corner yet, I could still be safe!
But I manage to "pull" myself away. I see the man from myself again and he is reaching out, but this time more plaintively. (It's as if if I am him he can escape, but if I'm not he can't?) I turn around and walk away. I try to go through the door that girl went through, I see her through the glass. (Is it a regular door in a hallway, or a shop door, or a shower door?) I see her turning around and smiling at me.
"Finally" I think as my hand turns the handle "I can be --" and I stop short as I swing the glass door open.
Because when I reach the other side she is not there. I stop and stare, confused. Too late I run back to the door, but it has closed and locked. Is it my fault or did it just happen or was it done to me out of cruelty?
She is gone. My pack is gone, too. All I had is gone (pack), all I was going to have is not there (girl).
And then this entire world is gone because that is when I wake up. I have a mix of relief and melancholy.

Apartment Neighbor Trouble

I am in an apartment, I think. But sometimes it feels like a big house.

I wake up and decide to go shower. I turn on a music machine (computer? It lists a disc or playlist I had forgotten I had made so I played that.) I like the songs so I want to find a way to keep the music playing as I shower. The shower is just around the corner.
So, I go to the door to the hall to close it. I hear a dog and i imagine it is in the kitchen (I see the kitchen in my mind's eye).
I close the door, but see there is a bending door behind it. Like an accordion door. What is behind THAT door? Another shower! But, why is there a shower here when there is already one in the back of the room>? This is just the shower, nothing else. The other shower is a full bathroom.
So, I go back to the big shower room and take a moment to listen to this song who's lyrics have caught my attention. It sounds like Emmylou Harris. The lyrics and simple beauty of the song stop me, and I remember who I made this playlist for. It was for a girl that was very special to me but apparently I wasn't special enough to her.

***

Now I am back in bed but in a different position. I feel like I am higher, like this room you get to with steps from the room before, and this bed is raised even more. There is a window by the bed. I hear quite the commotion outside. I try to part the blinds, but that doesn't work so raise them. I can look out he window, it looks like it is a few hours from dawn or dusk. I can see a hill with trees on it. The window looks painted with rain drops. But I can't see what I am hearing. I press my cheek to the window trying to crane my neck to see ... I can feel the coolness of the window stealing my heat away.
So, I raise the sash. At first it doesn't catch, so I try again and it catches this time. I still can't see but I can hear better. I hear people wondering and complaining against a neighbor. I hear a dog barking from being upset.
So, I raise the screen next, and now I can freely pop my head out into the air. I want to see and not be seen at the same time. I see a man, he's white and doughy. He is yanking a dog around with a leash, and the dog has had enough!
Suddenly I see the man struggling not only with a dog, but also a man in a uniform. A dark navy blue uniform with gold patches. A security guard ... a police officer? I can't be sure, but he is a big strong white guy. The neighbor is complaining against the dog and the Uniform at the same time. The uniform subdues the man and starts taking him away. He stops a moment to pat the dog. The dog stops barking and licks the Uniform's hand. A female neighbor (white as well, long hair, looks young like she is in her mid-20s, athletic) comes up and takes the dog. I do not know if it is her dog or if she is offering to keep it while the man is taken away.

The first thing I think of when I wake up is "Darn, I never did get that shower." lol!

Summer Camp of Doom

I dreamed I was in a hotel/apartment complex/dorm room type place. Lots of other people at some place where we did things. We seemed to be in our 20's I suppose. But I seemed to be spending most of my time in my room. I went out to activities, groups, but I either didn't really like them or didn't really feel right about the people there.
Later, I think it is nearly time to go, maybe later today. I hear all these people in the hallway, but I am still trying to sleep. I get up, sit at my desk, turn the computer on, but I am too sleepy so I go back to bed. But I can't sleep because I keep hearing the people in the hallway.
I am upset at them for not letting me sleep more, it is only 5 am (then 7 am) I want to sleep more and I can. But when I get up and look out the door I see them all having a great time. So, I smile at that and walk into the hallway. But it is if I am a ghost. No, worse than that. They see and hear me, but they are either preoccupied with their games/activities, full up, or don't ask me to join them.
Maybe I need to shower and dress first (dream logic here lol) so I go back and shower and dress and come out with some cool thing we can play with (forget what it is), but as I go to my door, at first it is stuck.
Then it looks like it's been damaged on the sides. But I am frustrated with it not opening and so I keep wiggling it to get it open ... and I do! But the whole door comes off the frame! Now what am I going to do? Surely now people are going to come in and steal my stuff. This looks so stupid. Why wasn't I more careful and patient? But wait ... it looks like I just "finished the job" started by others, because I see evidence of people trying to pry the door open from the outside.
So now I am pre-occupied with worry about the door. My computer and stuff are in there! But I can't stay in that room all day. Well, actually, what happened after I cleaned up was that the phone rang. I thought "good, Katelin is calling me to wish me a happy birthday!" and yes that is what I actually thought in the dream lol! So I pick up the phone all excited, forgetting all my troubles, when I hear the voice I am shocked. It is my dad! Well, OK, this may be OK, I will listen to what he has to say. "John, I am coming to pick you up." I answer "How do you know, how do you know where I am?" "I know you are failing and can't handle things on your own so it would just be best if you stopped .." I cut him off and say "Dad, please just let me be. I love you but you keep pushing me away by trying to make me not myself." "Now, John, your mother is crying. Just do as I say." I hang up the phone.
I try to brush it off and just look to be with people, but they are STILL in their own little worlds. But now it seems the majority of them are doing things I don't want to do ... drinking and other stuff. Great, so no family or friends. That's OK, it is almost over here.

So I end up approaching a group of girls that are like "camp counselors/guides". I stand there, waiting for them to notice me so I won't be rude. But they don't say anything to me. They are supposed to be here for us, to answer questions and help us with knowing the schedule and where things are and what to do, etc. But they are instead talking about makeup, gossip about movie stars, and boys. ugh!
So, I clear my throat and say I need some help.
"Duh! You are fat bald and old and you dress like a ... I don't know what. And you can't shave worth a damn!"
No, I need help with something here. When are the shuttles to take us to the airport coming? She just rolls her eyes and answer under her breath "it's written on your schedule just look at that." Then I tell them my door is broken, off it's hinges even, what do I do? They just glare at me and walk away! "OK, thanks, sorry to have bothered you." I say to their backs. I wasn't sarcastic.
I go back to my room. I want to call a friend, but I see the phone is pulled out from the wall. Did I do that after talking with my dad? I go to the computer but it won't turn on. So I go to bed again. I lie on my back, but then I can't breathe. Maybe if I move I will be able to breathe again. I manage to move my hand to cover my heart. But I can't feel a heart beat!

I wake up like that. Lying on my back, not breathing with my hand on my heart not feeling a beat. I sense something to the side of the bed, and it leans towards me and then I can breathe again and I turn over on my side.

I do not recall all the details nor have I recorded them here just as they all happened because it is hard to recall and being in the dream is different when you wake up, but this includes what happened and how I feel it is OK to fill things in.

Slow Moving Flood

I am in the back of a car behind the passenger seat. An adult female (kind of like Trish's sister Barb = white, average height/weight, brown hair) is driving. A young woman is in the passenger seat (athletic, slightly taller than average maybe, white, light brunette, smiling face) and 1 or 2 other passengers in the back a female with dark brown hair with blonde highlights and perhaps a male?
The woman in the back and I have some friction between us I don't know why. I hardly notice the other male. I am neutral with the driver she seems to like me ok. The passenger in front ... we seem to have a deeper connection.

Many events occur. I cannot recall all details, but they include:

Driving through floods.
Often we come across roads already flooded and have to drive carefully or go another way.
One time we are driving down a road with country on both sides when a wave 1/2 the height of the car is seem coming towards us. We have time because for some bizarre reason the wave is very slow moving! Like in slow-motion.

(I forget the rest and did not have time to write it down further than this)

She Held My Hand As We Laugh And Explore

Finally I recall a dream again. And not just any dream, but a nice happy good one! But, as if I am cursed, I am pulled from the dream for no good reason way too soon.
:(
Why can't that happen with my nightmares or dreams I do not like or wish to recall (like a pre-cog), why with this one which is being comfortable with a female friend who is also comfortable with me? Y_Y
anyways ... the dream:

I am with this girl. She is a brunette. Sometimes her hair seems dark brown, other times light almost blonde, or even a dark blonde. She is white and around my height and has one of those kind pretty faces that is like a smile covering some sadness but prefers the smile.
We are inside a building. It has a place with tables and chairs to sit down but I don't know what for, I don't see any food or anything else. We walk through that area, but it is so narrow at times we have to walk in a line instead of side by side.
Then we find rooms like bathrooms and we both go into a different one.
I come out of mine, peeking around the door and see her doing the exact same thing. We both laugh at that!
Then we go into another room. This is like a cinema. We sit next to each other a few seats away from the right aisle I am on her left. The chairs seem like red velvet.
I don't know how to describe the movie. I don't recall enough details to be able to do so. But it is is like a light drama with comedy. At one point we are following this guy talking to another man but we can't ever see his face. Then the camera pans up his front and finally reveals his face.
When it does so I realize my friend is holding my hand and we turn to each other and laugh at the same time, her face is lit up! It feels so great that she is holding my hand and we are laughing at the same time like that. I am relaxed, at peace, next to no anxiety (still a little, but VERY little). I just feel comfortable being with this person and she with me.
What were we laughing at? It seems to me the man revealed may have been a famous person. Either a non-actor or a very famous actor in a film with no stars in it. Anyway, that was shock to see him, but more so because he had penciled in eyebrows like a woman BUT had not shaved off his real eyebrows! I don't get it, but it was hilarious anyway, very fun!
The movie is over and we are leaving. She is still holding my hand. I let her leads me wherever she wants to go. Oft times she holds are hands up high (mostly the kind of height you would get if you raised your hand up but kept your elbow down low towards your body). I don't mind I don't care what others may think I don't care where we go. She takes us into another bathroom like area. "oops" she says and we try to just make our way through to the other door, but when we go through that one we find ourselves in yet ANOTHER bath room! No one is in them and we laugh at the absurdity and confusion.
Just as we finally exit the bathrooms and walk around is when the dream cuts off. Opening my eyes a little later I see the clock says 5:38.

It would have been so fun to keep being with her as we held hands, laughed, and explored. Oh well ... back to life back to reality back from my fantasy back to the here and now ;-(

Real Field of Dreams, Thai food

Real Field of Dreams

Last night, I was stirred awake a bit. Seemed normal enough to me, it happens sometimes. But this time it was different!
I decide to open my eyes, to see what time it is, except I don't open my eyes to see my apartment ceiling ... but the open starry sky instead!

It is night here, too. The black of the sky has a very slight dark-blue to it. I can see constellations of small-dots of stars twinkling e ever so gently.
Now birds are flying over me, one at a time in a line. Most of them are carrying what I discern to be nesting material (grass, small pieces of twigs, etc.). I do not know what kind they were, but I can see their dark 3-D form above me, way above me, also black but with a slight color to them (like a hint of browns?). I say "Good evening" to them. Suddenly I realize something and say outloud to them "Please don't go to the bathroom on me!" I try to pull something over my face as a guard just in case, it is hard to pull. It is either my shirt that i am wearing or my sheet, it is hard to pull because I am wearing the shirt -OR- I am lying on my back on the sheet.
The birds do me no harm. I watch as one or two of them drop the items they carry in their mouths and wonder why they are doing that. Then I realize I should count them, but I forgot to. 3, 5, 7 of them?

But wait, I can't be outside.
I decide to investigate some more. I really hope I don't wake myself up from doing this because this is really cool!

I raise my head a bit. In front of me I see a gently rolling down-hill to a line of bare trees and beyond a house. Looking to my right I see grass and a white log falling apart. About as long as a bed and tall as my knee? I am not sure.
More investigation reveals I am lying on something soft like the (duvet?) very top bed spread from my bed, I have a single sheet wrapped around me like a mummy, and a pillow under my head.
I move a hand out from the sheet and onto the grass ... I am feeling grass! I run my fingers through it as if it were hair of Mother Earth. I find what feels like a leaf. I bring it up to my mouth, but sheets are tight in the way, but I manage it anyway. It seems like an elongated vesica Pisces shape, palm length and yellow.

OK, so far sight is here, and also touch. What about taste?
I bring the leaf up to my nose. It doesn't really smell but I catch a hint. But that's not good enough.
So I put it in my mouth, not breaking it with my teeth but rather rolling it on my tongue.
I can taste the slight bitterness of a real leaf!
Taste too?

I take the leaf out of my mouth and try to find a place to put it, store it. I am having trouble finding a pocket. I think I find one, but I am having trouble putting the leaf in there. Then I realize I should have just left it in my mouth, but I was scared I might swallow it and/or choke on it so I didn't.

As a coda, I cannot recall how the dream ended. I did not wake up with it, I had other dreams after it. Sad to tell you I have no evidence yet found from my Journey. No leaf in my pajama pocket :(

Nothing harmed me there. There was little movement but from the birds flying over me and dropping things sometimes (which seemed to float down sometimes, so there was gravity here). No wind, no clouds, and I don't think the grass was very wet either. I did not really feel the temperature. I hope the lack of colors was from it being night and that it was not because i was in LANE (Lower Astral Negative Entity) territory. I don't think I was, it had neither fear or ecstasy ... no strong emotions were elicited from me as I would think they would do if I was in their world. But that can only be a guess.

I cannot be sure if I heard anything or not, to be honest. If it was silent the silence did not bother me. I don't know where I was but it kind of reminded me of my parent's house. But I cannot be sure it was that.

***

Thai Restaurant

I am in a small Thai restaurant, in a corner with another person. At first I felt weary, I think I just came from a dream that was a bit scary (well, not scary, but more slightly ominous, a slight hint of danger from people, and I feel I ducked in here to be safe, but the feeling had not gone away yet). But it was OK.
The menu in front of me was half-the-size of a book cover. Under each menu item, under the number name and short description, was a small line of food. A small sample of what that dish would look like.
What was odd is that the samples looked 3-D!
It was a really cool and neat idea, I was fascinated by that so much I was not paying attention to what I should order :)
The waitress was already here. She asked the other people what they wanted. Then it is my turn.
She shows me another menu, this one the size of a book cover, and points to one. HOUSE FAVORITE: PUSH
She recommends me that one because she senses I want one full of taste and nutrition but not spicy.
So I order PUSH. I think that was the name of it?

Inside A Conspiracy

Terrorist weapon to target our area to shut us up.
Nuke them before they can hurt us? Are you kidding me?

Gathering my possesions together ... what to take ... what to leave
Why do I feel rushed and impatient to leave at the same time?
If we are in a rush, why is it taking so long to get going?

A man in our party appoints himself leader.
He has connections.
He says he knows someone who can use a nuke as a distraction or defense.
He knows a man who can get us fake papers.
He knows a network to get us out of here and help us on the run.
...
How do you know all of this?
How did you get these connections?
Using a nuke that's insane!
I thought that man was dead, and did you say adoption papers?
How is there a whole network for this?
...
This man seems to know everything, he has taken control of the situation.
I don't like that he is telling us how to do things in every detail!
But he is making a point by seemingly having our safety at hand.
I am not sure what to think, he argues the logic so well
and escape and safety IS the ultimate goal.
I argue with him, but he is so calm, always has an answer.
What do I have? I have no proof, maybe I am wrong.
But why do I feel something is off about this whole thing?

Need a shower ... this is an odd place for a shower.
It is behind a /--\ wooden bar.
It is in a salon or living room.
Out in the open behind the bar.
I see the faucet with water but nothing else.
No handles to turn on cold and hot water, no special floor, no drain ....
no curtain, no towel rack, no soap or shampoo.
But this is where I am to shower.
I don't know about this ...
I can't shower yet, anyway ... a couple other people are still in the room.
I want my privacy.
Still in the room is a woman 20 years younger than me & another 11-20 years older.
(I feel guilty because a part of me wouldn't mind if the younger woman stayed but why not the older one that isn't fair I am older by as much to the younger woman as the other woman is older than me yet I don't want her to stay so obviously the younger woman isn't going to want to stay either, besides I am showering that is private to me no matter what so in the end I want both women to go)
I finally get them to leave.
But I still can't get over this odd shower, I work on using it.
I don't even really undress ... what the heek is this all about?
It is just too illogical and it breaks me from the dream.

Dream Presents from a female friend!

I am in an apartment or home. Suddenly I get these presents (put through a mail slot?) and I am so excited because they are presents from a girl! yAy!
I got three presents in total:

1) I am not sure what it is because I set it aside for later. It was like a thin small hand-held device. Silvery-gray. It had a lot of buttons on it. It might have been a fancy calculator? I don't know, but it was cool!

2) A small (about the length of the hand palm and fingers) figurine! I wasn't sure what it was at first, but when I showed it to others I was sure that it was .....
Shaggy from Scooby Doo!
I thought that was cool and played with it a bit.

3) A remote-control-like (radio-control?) vehicle! It was like a futuristic hummer-tank thingie I am not sure what it was but it was really cool as well! I played with that too.

***

I showed someone like unto my dad my toys I got. I was really happy with them and just in JOY with this female friend of mine. I can't call it romantic love, but it was certainly BLISS.
My dad wasn't really concentrating (losing himself in) the toy truck, instead he wanted to point out the negatives of this friendship.
I got tired of all that noise, filling my heart with fear and doubt pushing out hte JOY, that I stopped him and got in his face to leave me alone I can handle this it's not bad it's fine!
Those are not the words I used, I forget my actual words.

***

I am not sure who this friend was. One guess was that it was Jozie.
Another was my Texas College friend.
I'm not sure ... maybe it was meant to be female friends in general.
Just as the presents were meant to be taken not as they were but as symblos metaphors for the gifts I get from my friends ^_^

Russia Gets Cocky, Gets Hit With the MI5 Defense (and other scandelous DreamZZZ)

It's going to be hard to put these into words ...

I am bedside. A man is sitting on a bed and a woman is lounging on it. She is very happy with him. He wants to just sit there and stay with her, but he has a Mission. A young girl suddenly appears and reminds him of this mission, and why it is OK to leave the pretty adoring lady. "Don't forget, you have Defense M-15!"
(for a moment i reminded of Admiral Adama as played by Lorene Greene in the original TV Series "Battle Star Galactica").
Then I feel I am watching Russia. They are being cocky. They are speaking propaganda phrases and puffing up with power and false claims of working for peace when they are planning on doing the exact opposite. Things are starting to look bleak, but then comes along "Defense M-Fifteen". I don't know what it does, but I know that is what happens, and Russia is all "oh noes!" and their plans are turned around and they make a deal so as to actually work for peace and to help their people and it inspires the rest of the world and we have peace!
But it wasn't Lorene Green, who was it really? I see this figure in a kitchen. He has been secretly poisoned by someone who does not want his Defense M-15 to ever happen. Luckily he has not taken the full dose, but a sip does him harm. He falls to the floor clutching his chest.
His son runs in just in time and attends to him. He knows just what to do and is able to save his dad in such a way that there is no lasting damage either!

Now I am looking at a kind of game-board mini-game from a computer / console game like "graphic". It is of the "good guy's" piece (looking like a triangular space ship I think?) moving from bull's eye like place to place. It waits just long enough for the "bad guy's" piece to come to his area but move just in time. Every time the enemy's piece lands right where he wants it to. Soon a pattern is made and he gets him to land on the final spot, activating "Defense em-eye-five".

******

Another dream has me arguing with a co-worker about real work. It is about a resident (who really exists) with the last name of Starbuck (who, coincidently, was a major character name in Battle Star Galactica). In real life, she expired recently. Well in the dream she wanted me to make an admitting chart for a returning admission, Starbuck! Bu I said "how can we, she's dead." She argues "no she's not, if she was she couldn't return could she, now just do the chart." But I look at the information, and I go get the expired chart, and I see they are exactly the same, it is the same person. I show her the expired chart. At first she is mad that I am wasting time and challenging her authority. But I say "please look, I am not being a jerk here, this is serious." She takes a moment to calm down and actually looks. Her eyes get big! She calls the admission office to ask why they gave her information on an expired patient, they say they didn't and confirm the information. Further more they tell us to hurry with the chart because she is here.
We have her death paper work as found in the facility and the doctor filled out the official Death Certificate, and yet here she is alive and returning to the facility from a hospital very much alive!
So, in other words, we have proof of a TSLD!

******

QUESTIONS: I have a synchronicity here. Two different kinds of dream scenarios, both with a connection to Battle Star Galactica. Why? And why did it seem more connected to the original show than the modern one? Especially since I have not seen the original in forever but have the new one full-set? But haven't watched it recently and only watched it as a disc set (not on TV) once, months and months ago!

What was that about Russia and "Defense M-15/MI5"? MI5 is the name for British Intelligence.
The I looks like a 1, so is that why i first heard "Defense M-fifteen". Does "Defense M 15" or something similar have it's own significance?
1) Well ... Israeli Defense does carry something called M15, which is a gas mask .
2) Then there is "Jose Chungs Doomsday Defense: M15" by Mark Snow -- a piece of music from TV series "Millennium".

Wouldn't it be cool to carry over evidence from one TimeLine to Another during a Shift? XD

There seemed to be important things here, but I don't know what ...